Guilt: Reason Why I Was An Atheist

Calvin & Hobbes

As a young teenager with Christian upbringing, ethical/moral guilt was one of the reason I rejected the belief in Christian God. The guilt was too consuming. I knew well my do-not  laws of God, to which none I kept. Every time I stole something, or told a lie, or explore my manhood, my conscience bored witness to the moral wrongness of the acts. The only way I could fight against my moral guilt was to eliminate the Christian God from the picture.

As Fyodor Mikhailovich Dostoyevsky’s character Kririllov put it:

“If God exists, all is His will and from His will I cannot escape. If not, it’s all my will and I am bound to show self-will.”

15 thoughts on “Guilt: Reason Why I Was An Atheist

  1. @fielnyrb – I didn’t say forcing, I said “pushing.” Perhaps you thought I meant forcing but I simply meant that giving a name such as Prayson is “pushing” as in the sense of influencing. The same way towns here in the USA have names such as Bethel, Bethlehem, Nazareth and all sorts of other Christian names because of Christian influence. If someone claims to never have had any Christian influence in their life, simply put they are lying.

    @Prayson – Are you really that brain dead? If you had a Christian upbringing you had a Christian influence in your life. I think this will be my last reply on your blog unless you stop your bullshit lying for Jesus.

    • Dear Noreligion,

      I did not deny Christian influence in my life. In the Why I am Not An Atheist comment(May 29, 20:52), I wrote:

      “Indeed I agree with you that parents plays a great role, but all in all, children as the grow up in a universe full of information,tend to test their believes.

      When I say religion was not pushed, I mean, our parents allowed us, at our teenhood to choose our personal beliefs.”

      But that is not the issue here, what I am asking you to explain is how is p: Christian upbringing/influence and q:them not “pushing” their belief, can not both be true?

      BTW: If it is possible, could you be kind to be gentle in your writing. 😉

  2. noreligion, could you please explain to us how naming a child a Christian name is the same as the act of forcing one’s religion on the child?

  3. Did Dawkins or Ruse make the same asinine claim as you? If not, why are you stupidly bringing up what amounts to nonsense? Why are you asking the same question I already answered? Do you have some kind of mental defect?

    • Hej Noreligion 🙂

      Fielnyrb is asking what I have being asking: How does Christian naming the same as the act of forcing one’s religion on the child?

      Two or more events are said to be mutually exclusive if the occurrence of any one of them means the others will not occur (That is, we cannot have two events occurring at the same time).

      Thus if p and q are mutually exclusive events, then Probability of p and q is equal to zero.

      Now you argue that 1(p) and 2 (q) are two mutually exclusive things(proposition):

      p = Prayson had Christian upbringing
      q = Prayson’s parents did not “push” their beliefs in Prayson

      My question is how are this two mutually exclusive? Meaning that if p then q must be false(or verse). How is that so?

  4. I thought you were a critical thinker that liked logic? Now I don’t believe you were ever an atheist or even a skeptic about anything. How is it that someone who claims to like logic can’t identify two mutually exclusive things? Tell me, if your parents didn’t push their Christianity on you how is your name Prayson (that is pushing an aspect of their Christianity) and how did you have a Christian upbringing (that is pushing much more than one aspect of their Christianity). Please engage your brain before saying contradictory things. Also, it would be a really good idea not to tell contradictory stories on your blog otherwise someone will think you are lying for christ (which was established as a good practice by Paul in 2 Corinthians 12:16)

    • Dear Noreligion,

      1. Prayson had Christian upbringing
      2. Prayson’s parents did not “push” their beliefs in Prayson

      Richard Dawkins describes his childhood as “a normal Anglican[Christian] upbringing(Pollard, Nick (1995-04). “High Profile”. Third Way (Harrow, England) 18 (3): 15.) So I wonder what you are entailing 🙂

      Christian naming does not entail pushing of Christianity, because if that was so then atheist pro. Michael Ruse, being called None-like God: Michael or Daniel Dennett, God is a judge(Daniel) would have being Christian 🙂

      So my question is. How is 1 and 2 contradictory. Remember p is contradictory if and if only p is said to be q and not-q at the same time and same sense.

      Please show us how 1 and 2 are contradictory thus one or both necessary false.

      Prayson 🙂

    • Hej 🙂

      You 1 and 2 can not both be true

      1. Prayson had Christian upbringing
      2. Prayson’s parents did not “push” their beliefs in Prayson

      Could you explain how is that so?

  5. Nobody said that Prayson lost his faith because of his parents. Even if his parents were not pushy Prayson could still lose interest in God because he felt uncomfortable with the whole idea of God. Not necessarily his parents’ fault.

  6. It’s incredible how God has changed your life, he has been merciful against you
    and showen you the truth, and you have truly embraced it. We serve a, loving, holy, righteous and merciful God.

    Your life is a great testimony of how Good God is :).

  7. As a young teenager with Christian upbringing

    Now you say this but when I replied to your saying this:

    I was raised by most wonderful Christian parents who did not push their beliefs on my two brothers and I

    POSTED @

    You said I was wrong and that your parents never pushed their beliefs on you. Tell me, if they didn’t, why is your name Prayson and why did you feel guilty for rejecting god? BTW, atheists do not reject god as it is an impossibility to reject what doesn’t exist.

    • Hej Noreligion 🙂

      What is the contradiction between Christian upbringing and the parents who did not push their belief?

      My name is Prayson because that is what my Christian parent desired to call me.(Should atheist pro. Michael Ruse complain to his parent for calling him None-like God: Michael or Daniel Dennett for been called God is a judge(Daniel) ?) 🙂

      My dad prayed to have a safe delivery of his child. A boy pop out and was called Pray-Son(Swahili:Mtoto wa maombi) a son out of his prayers 🙂

      Why did I feel guilt?:


      1. If Christian God existed and I have broken his laws, then I am morally guilty.
      2. Christian God exist and I have broken his laws.
      3. Therefore I am morally guilt.

      That was the reason 🙂

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